Missing in Action

I've been missing for several days and I apologize. My laptop had to go into the shop again, and my pc is painfully slow, so I just didn't feel like dealing with it. So, in the meantime, I've been living my life and trying to pretend I've never heard of Cushing's, that I don't have limitations, and that so many people that I care about are not sick. It felt really good, I can't lie. I needed a reprieve for a bit, and I took it. I actually thought about going into hiding mode, never to return and never to again address the illness that has ruled my life for the past several years.



I've been walking every day. Every morning I get up and have my coffee and then go meet my friend and we walk 3 miles. We talk about everything on these walks....our husbands, our children, our prospective jobs and the heartache of losing our longtime jobs. (We did that together, too.) We check out the lake houses and claim the ones we want to buy when we win the lottery. (Mine is a very modest little house with a wrap around deck.) We make plans for the weekend. We plan menus. We huff and puff and discuss our health issues. She has terrible feet, has had two toes amputated. I have a painful mass in my calf. (Myxedema?) And we keep on trucking, keep on moving along, until we reach our destination. It is therapy. Physical AND emotional. I feel so much better when we are done, but some days it is really hard.



Summer's almost over here, you can feel it in the air. The thought of winter depresses me and I just want these days to continue. The future for us right now is scary. We both worry about losing our homes and not being able to pay the bills. But for an hour every morning we are solving all our problems, walking those 3 miles. We're enjoying the journey, not focusing on the destination.